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Withdrawl Symptoms

Thursday, November 19, 2009


I’m trying to wean myself off of eight cups of coffee a day. I’ve only had one cup of instant coffee. No thick rich Ugandan coffee in a French press today. Sadness.

Too much coffee was making me a bit…crazy. But, not enough coffee is making me a bit…bitchy. It’s a delicate balance.

Yesterday I walked around looking at crafts, drinking coffee, looking at crafts, drinking coffee, shopping at the most expensive Woolworths I’ve ever seen and then going home.

My eyes itch, my throat stings and my nose is runny. Yet, not runny enough to avoid the smell of burning trash.

Every morning I am greeted by a little surprise in the toilet from someone who has not discovered the flush lever. It taunts me from across the room while I try to shower.

The internet is slow as fuck. 18 download hours remain on the one episode of Dexter I have been slowly downloading over the past 5 days.

My skin feels disgusting with a layer of thick sunscreen and toxic bug lotion over a tight sunburn.

The dog lying under my feet keeps farting.

The 800lb hog standing outside my room was making threatening gestures at me this morning.

Holy fuck, now it smells like someone’s manufacturing rubber next door. I’m glad I turned in my recalled water bottle tainted with 0.00001% BPA before I left. I wouldn’t want anything toxic in my system.

OK…that’s all I can think to bitch about at the moment. Which, actually, reminds me that things really aren’t that bad.

I just need some coffee.

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